I’ve had discussions with parents who receive and give child support, read news articles on parents who don’t pay their payments, and even go to jail. Sadly, this system is one hundred percent biased against men. One portion of the system that is really bad is the child support payments system.
You see there is a few huge flaws in the system. First and foremost, when you are with someone, like a marriage, and one person’s income changes, then the household spending changes with it. Cutting back on the budget, shopping, spending etc. After the marriage ends, however, those payments don’t adjust or change. This is a huge flaw and this lands many fathers in jail or leaving the country. (Like this one: http://www.thespec.com/news-story/2248120-hamilton-area-deadbeat-dad-flees-to-philippines/)
Most fathers, don’t get custody of their children and those children are used by the mothers as weapons, to get even and even extort money from their ex-husbands. What is even worse still, is men who agree with this system.
Men are less likely to get custody of their children in a divorce, and if they are lucky get to see their children every other weekend and rotating holidays, at worst one weekend a month. And for this, they are forced to pay half their pay cheque to go to the child and the ex wife. Alimony and Child Support.
This is where I have issues. If the ex spouse is no longer receiving Alimony due to marrying someone else, then the only extra money they are getting is from child support. If they have married someone who makes less than the ex husband does, then the wife receives a drastic drop in money. So the argument many parents who receive this support is, “I spent all my money on my kid, so the money I got in support is reimbursing me.
To anyone who thinks this way, you are a spoiled self entitled brat and should be ashamed of yourselves. That goes to any one who spent any money on themselves from that child support payments.
Both parents have to realize that this type of thinking is harmful to the children. It means you are taking money that is supposed to go to them to buy things you want. This may sound good to you, but it’s really horrible.
You both had a child. That means you are both responsible, for that child’s well being. If your the parent who got full custody and has the roof over the child’s head then, part of the money goes to that roof, food, clothing and if anything is left then, is supposed to go to things like extracurricular activities, hobbies and even toys or in the bank for a college education or for an emergency.
It is not meant to compensate you, if you spend all your money on the child you created so you can get your nails done or your hair done.
Alimony payments are payments to support YOU, as the ex spouse. To ensure you live the way you are accustomed to until such time you remarry. You don’t get child support to pay for your personal expenses. The money you receive for your child is for your child.
The judge in court is biased against men in general because of the system in place. So they of course will tell the women that the money is to go to reimburse them, but this is NOT the truth. This is why there are two types of support payments.
This is why I call it the lottery jackpot for women. This is why women have children, without thought. They know, they will be taken care of and even the province will pay them money per child. In Quebec, they used to pay over a thousand dollars a month per child, to the mother in baby bonus. This was an encouragement to people to have children to raise the population numbers. Now imagine if you had say three children and then got divorced, and had to pay child support, and the average being a grand per child. So the mother would receive not only Alimony, but child support and baby bonus cheque. Just baby bonus and child support alone for three children would be over six grand a month in Quebec (or used to), but then if you added in Alimony say two grand and you have a whopping eight thousand dollars a month in free money to the ex wife. Even if you remove the Alimony, and say one child, that is two grand a month in money. That is money the wife is getting for support of the child. The sad part is she is not expected to get a job and input her own money. However, some women do work hard and to put money into the support of their child, and that is a responsible thing to do. What is not responsible is taking some of the child support payments and spending it on yourself as “reimbursement” because you spent all your money on the child by putting a roof over it’s head, food on the table and gas money driving the child around town to appointments or football practice.
Guess what? That is the responsibility of being the parent who got custody. Heck that is the responsibility of any parent period.
This system is also why women are raping men. It is why Feminists will scream rape, even for consensual sex and why more men are swearing off women completely.
Women are paid to have babies, and get paid in a myriad of ways that encourages them to get pregnant and have a kid. It’s a horrible system that has forced many men into poverty. This system is more harmful than good.
It helps increase the following:
– Male Homelessness or poverty.
– Male Depression
– Male Suicide rates.
And the worst part is the children suffer. They will hear the mother complaining to her friends or family that the “deadbeat” dad didn’t send his money to her, and so he is a horrible person.
Don’t be that Mom and spend that money on yourself. Spend it on your kid, and if you have any left over, put it in a bank account for your child’s education. Your hair and nails are just not that important compared to your child’s future.